potosi | welcome to dwrp you nerd

[ or, how to fail at life, almost literally, a story by sawamura eijun. ]

[ sawamura eijun is very, very hungry.

this isn't a particularly abnormal experience. he's always hungry in some way, shape or form, and he can't even really eat. if there's one thing he's going to blame stupid miyuki kazuya for for the rest of his life, it's the fact that he can't eat real food anymore. no, it's blood sucking this, and killing people that, and look, eijun tries!! really hard!! to be a decent member of his clan, but when it comes down to it, he's a little tiny bit squeamish and would rather just go ham on three bowls of rice than suck someone dry.

it's been a week and a half or so since his last proper meal, and he's starving. some instinctual part of him drags him over to the closest college campus, because he'll probably be able to find something there, and what catches his sensitive nose is in fact the very faint scent of fresh blood.

he practically barks with delight and scrambles forward, taking off through the campus like a bat out of hell (and earning many a strange look with his loud yelling the whole way there.) it's dark outside, so there shouldn't really be anybody around to judge him or stop him, and eijun runs forward towards the medical ward--he's almost home free--!!! ]

--Oof! [ right up until he collides, almost face first in a jumble of limbs, with someone coming out of the med lab and locking the door.

just like that, the smell disappears...although perhaps it was just donated blood bags he was smelling. smh, eijun ]

[ Kanemaru Shinji considers himself to be a pretty normal, hardworking, average guy.

He does his school work in a timely fashion, doesn't procrastinate, gets good grades... He works his ass off diligently in his med school program, hoping that his strong work ethic and finely tuned skills will get him a good job as a doctor once College Hell™ is over and done with. He always volunteers to stay late when other students don't want to in the hopes it'll get him easily into his professors' good graces, which has thus far worked out for him...

...at least until tonight when a fucking weirdo he doesn't recognize slams into him, nearly knocking him over the second he gets out of the damn door of the lab.]

Uh, can I help you?!

[ He tries not to sound annoyed as all fuck. He fails. ]

[ eijun definitely stumbles backwards, grabbing onto the front of the guy's shirt to keep from falling right on his ass--that sure wouldn't be very supernatural creature-like of him. it's only the reflexes of being some kind of supernatural creature that keeps them both from toppling to the floor, since he rights them both at the top of the stairs without a lot of effort.

that, and the guy he barreled into's at least a guy, at least a little sturdy. it wouldn't be the first time he bowled someone over on accident.

eijun blinks at him--for a brief second, his eyes catch a brilliant goldish yellow in the light--but he shakes his head really quickly. shit, he needs an excuse of some kind. uh. ]

Hey--I'm dying! [ eijun ] I need your help, Mr, uh,-- [ he pauses, looks for a nametag-- ] Hey, how come you don't have an ID thingy?! Doctor-sensei!

[ eijun he's clearly a college student come on ]

[ Maybe Shinji has been working too hard... Not only is this-- by all accounts healthy and rambunctious-- idiot telling him he's *dying*, but... did his eyes look gold for a moment there? This has to be some kind of a dream. ]

I-I'm not a doctor! How old do you think I look?! [ He takes a frustrated moment to try to regain his composure. What if this loud moron actually does need help? ]

I'm a student here. How are you "dying"? If you're drunk or high or whatever, you should probably go back to your dorm before a professor sees you.

[ eijun didn't even think about him not being a doctor, and that much reads all over his face. it kind of comes with the territory of being a vampire..age isn't really a thing. either way, he just blinks at him for a second, and then returns right back to panicking.

pretending to panic? who knows. ] I'm bleeding!! A lot!! [ there is zero evidence of blood anywhere. ] And I'm not that!! I'm not even a student, I just need help!! Lots of it!! Please, doctor-sensei!!

[ eijun is zero percent convincing, but he does in fact put on his biggest, best puppy face. it's pretty deadly. ]

[ Shinji knew he shouldn't be skeptical of someone who claimed to be bleeding but... he sure didn't see anything. ]

Bleeding where? [ Probably not the most doctorly thing to say in this situation, he admits to himself. If the blood isn't visible, does he really want to know the answer to this question? Ugh... ]

What do you want me to do for you exactly? [ will be regret asking this question in the near future? Probably yes. ]

[ eijun blanks for a solid second on the question where because he doesn't...really...know...

he didn't really think this through. luckily, the guy asks him a follow up question! what a good doctor!! he's impressed!! eijun holds onto his side like that's what's bleeding, though it's a little late for that, and also even just thinking about blood at this moment is making him kind of dizzy.

but he's not gonna attack this guy!! sawamura eijun is a gentleman!! ] I NEED AN EXAMINATION. [ he blurts, loudly. ] And, uh, stitches! And a blood transfusion!!

[ sweats ]

[ Shinji already has a bad feeling about this, but he can't just walk away from this idiot if he claims he needs a fucking blood transfusion. What kind of future doctor would he be if he left a possible patient alone in his time of need? ]

Fine. Follow me then.

[ There's a bat in his corner of the office. If this dude tries to mug him, Shinji is not opposed to utilizing some of his high school baseball skills, "injured" or not. But for now... he's going to give him the benefit of the doubt. ]

Edited 2017-04-22 03:17 (UTC)

[ YESSS, it worked! eijun's a genius! he's the smoothest guy on the whole planet!! seriously, he'd be patting himself on the back right now if he wasn't so hungry. it was a pretty good idea to get him to give him one of those blood packs, but...eijun didn't really think this plan all the way through.

still, he follows after him, even faking a little limp like that is somehow going to effect where he's bleeding. it's not that hard to act, though--he feels pretty crappy because he's so hungry.

maybe if he chatters at the back of this guy's head... neck... head... he'll be okay? ] You're a life saver!! Definitely a big life saver! I won't forget it, I promise! Even though I don't know your name yet, when I learn it I won't forget it!!

[ Every fiber in Shinji's body tells him he's going to regret this, but... ]

It's Kanemaru.

[ He pats the medical bed expectantly. As much as he doesn't feel in the mood to be inspecting the body of some random NOT!student when he should be at home by now getting ready to sleep, he feels like he's somehow too far gone to not follow through with this and get it over with. ]

And I'm going to need your name too. And health insurance card. [ in his defense, he only smirks a little at that last part. ]

[ eijun's completely and utterly distracted because when he walks in behind him, he inhales, and can definitely smell the blood bank from three doors away. his stomach gives a loud, impressive gurgle and eijun claps both of his arms over it, hunching over a little bit. god, he's so hungry...

oh--he's asking for something. ] Sawamura! [ he barks, at least well trained enough to get that, and then blinks, big huge golden eyes looking up at shinji from where he's still a little bent over. ] Wait, my what?

[ Shinji finally feels like he has the upper hand in this weird-ass situation. ] Well you don't expect us doctors [ ...or med students. Whatever. ] to work for FREE do you?

[ He lifts his eyebrows. ] Don't tell me you forgot your wallet with your insurance card or something? I'm sure we can look it up if it's legitimate.

[ there's a very, very long pause.

eijun looks very, very pathetic as he lets his shoulders drop. ]

Well...I guess I should go home... [ look at this sad, droopy puppy. it looks like you just kicked his dog, kanemaru. he's not even being manipulative--it just doesn't even occur to eijun that he could like, knock this guy out and go to steal some blood. he's ready to leave. ]

welcome to dwrp you nerd

KNSW: THE MOST FAIL VAMPIRE IN THE WHOLE WORLD AU.

Eijun is just championing at the After Life

he's a winner

To think poor Kanemaru will be married to him one day... smh

what a great meet cute this will be

These two are hopeless honestly

a great story to tell at the wedding later tho

Kanemaru is already mortified

kisses will make it better 500% guaranteed

Kanemaru will NEVER ADMIT THAT

:*

>:O!!!! ME WITH BAKAMURA? NEVER

fifty years later i can't believe i enver got an email for this tag